Gold-standard Hotties

Bored of the Games before they’ve even started?

Here are 10 very good reasons to tune in, sports fan or not.

Aldo Montano

Age: 33

Country: Italy

Sport: Fencing

Vital statistics: Aldo won gold at the 2004 Athens Olympics, and it looks like he’s in with a good chance of bagging another one in London. But who cares about the sport? We aren’t ones to sit on the, um, fence, when it comes to our crush on this Italian stallion. Because when he’s not thrusting his foil (that’s the swordy thing), Aldo does loads of modelling. In his pants. He’s the David Beckham of the fencing world. Yum.

Ben Ainslie

Age: 35

Country: UK

Sport: Sailing

Vital statistics: Not only is this gorgeous Ben’s fifth Olympics, but he’s a four-time Olympic medal winner and 10-times World Sailing Champion. Oh, and he has an OBE. Even better, there’s only one lady in 5ft 11in Ben’s life – Rita, his 130kg sailing boat. We’d sail off into the sunset with him any time.

Louis Smith

Age: 23

Country: UK

Sport: Gymnastics

Vital statistics: Louis’ strongest event is the pommel horse. At the Beijing Olympics in 2008, he became the first Brit to win a medal in individual gymnastics since 1928 (he took the bronze). Go Louis! Poor Lou fractured his finger in March, but he’s back on form for the Games. Thank god, cos he looks damn good in Lycra.

Ryan Lochte

Age: 27

Country: US

Sport: Swimming

Vital statistics: We’re holding an (Olympic) torch for cute super-swimmer Ryan. Apart from excelling at aquatics (he holds 57 medals in major international competitions, including three Olympic golds), he’s also doing pretty well in the looks department. Check out that six-pack! Fancy helping us perfect our breaststroke, Ryan? We’ve got bikinis that need a test drive…

Tom Boonen

Age: 31

Country: Belgium

Sport: Cycling

Vital statistics: We haven’t gone for men in cycling shorts since about 1992, but we’ll make an exception here. We’re going to hunt him down, with a walnut, and ask him if he can crack it with his thighs. No, really, we are. On your bikes, ladies – form an orderly queue.

Kenrick Monk

Age: 24

Country: Australia

Sport: Swimming

Vital statistics: Kenrick won gold and silver at the Commonwealth Games in 2010. Yay! Aussies call their athletes the “Inspiration for our Nation”, but we call him the “Encourage our boyfriends to work out to look like Kenrick inspiration”.

Kiel Brown

Age: 28

Country: Australia

Sport: Hockey

Vital statistics: When he’s not playing the field (hockey, obvs – though we wouldn’t mind meeting Kiel in a Walkabout bar), he is studying for a degree in psychology at Curtin University, Oz. So brains and beauty then – but he also has a GSOH. At the Beijing Olympics, he brought blow-up kangaroos and crocodiles to have a play fight with and set up a slushy maker in the middle of the Olympic village. We heart him!

Giuseppe Lanzone

Age: 29

Country: US

Sport: Rowing

Vital statistics: This 6ft 4in hunk is part of America’s 2012 rowing team, and has modelled Ralph Lauren’s 2008 and 2012 Olympic threads. No wonder, looking like that. But Peru-born Giuseppe isn’t just a pretty
face. He’s also a whiz at sudoku, so get brushing up on your puzzle-solving abilities, ladies.

Hugo Parisi

Age: 27

Country: Brazil

Sport: Diving

Vital statistics: As much as we love Tom Daley, there’s more than one good-looking diver in town at the minute. Hugo is another example of a streamlined, taut and – dang it – all-out fittie making a big splash in the Fabulous office. Those silky locks! The ability to make tiny trunks look appealing! That bronzed, Brazilian body! We think we’re going to invest in Portugese lessons. Nós te amamos, Hugo… (that means, we love you.)

Teddy Riner

Age: 23

Country: France

Sport: Judo

Vital statistics: Teddy is 6ft 8in (that’s quite tall). He won bronze at the 2008 Beijing Olympics but wins a Fabulous gold for hunkiness. Plus he’s French. Va-va-voom! We’d like a hug from this big Teddy bear. Let us know anytime you want a spot of play fighting, Ted.

Photography: Rex Features, Getty Images, AP, Mark Bourdillon, NNP
%d bloggers like this: